Archive of On the Go Answers from the Ultimate Mother-Daughter Duo

Are You Worried Your Daughter is going to Repeat Your Mistakes?


Are you afraid your daughter is going to repeat your mistakes?


Let’s give some examples:

(1) Your daughter wants to wear SHORT shorts, or a crop top to school — you remember the comments your body got when you were her age.

(2) She just had her first drink of alcohol. (You found out by accident, or she told you). You remember how you got into alcohol too young, and no adults knew what was going on, or what to do.

(*Eliza woke up Sil the first night she got drunk, confessed, and then vomited everywhere. TMI? We think not, this is Mothering & Daughtering after all, where we thrive on authenticity).

(3) She’s an epic procrastinator, like you, and she chronically doesn’t do her homework. You’re worried she’s going to fail, and not get into a good college.

There is a multitude of ways that well-intentioned mamas can look at their daughters and go: CRAP, she’s going to repeat my mistakes. She’s going to hurt the same way I hurt when I was her age. How can I change this? How can I protect her? How can I fix this?

Sometimes parts of this story you’ve concocted (about your girl, and who she is becoming in the world) are REAL.

And sometimes, it’s just your fear talking. Your unhealed stuff coming to the surface. (Because, GOSH, does raising a teenage girl call forth a mother to RISE and grow herself in all the places that her daughter needs her — so that it is no longer a girl raising a girl, but a woman raising a girl.)

Today, on the blog we’re talking about the difference between fear and intuition — the difference between a story from your past coming to haunt you, and your deeply grounded knowing as a mother that this is the present and it is different. This one comes up a lot with our community of mothers, and we’re so excited to share this episode with you.

Click the video below to watch.

Maybe your girl isn’t pushing any of your fear buttons with how she lives her life — and yet you’re noticing your own emotions coming up in raising a girl in today’s world? That’s normal, mama. This one is for you too.

Once you’ve gotten a chance to check out the video, leave a comment below — because collective wisdom rocks, and we want to hear your take. We need each other, mama.

Hi, We’re Sil & Eliza!

The mother-daughter dynamic duo behind Mothering & Daughtering. We’re downright devoted to you thriving not just surviving with your daughter during the preteen, teen years and beyond.

Find Out More


Leave a Comment

Related Posts:


curated deep dives into some of our favorite topics

Trusting Yourself, Trusting Your Daughter

Having Open-Hearted Communication

All Things Body