On the Go Answers from the Ultimate Mother-Daughter Coach

Raising White Kids in a Racist Culture

Jennifer Harvey

‘We need to commit to the hard work of breaking our children’s hearts, and not protecting our white kids’ ‘innocence.’ By doing so we deprive them of their humanity.’ – Jennifer Harvey

Hey Mama —
Jennifer’s words landed in my body when I read them. Maybe you’re feeling them too.There’s so many things we’re told in our culture (or feel) like we shouldn’t talk to our kids about, or, frankly, feel unprepared to talk to our kids about.

Sex.
Death.
Shame.
Mental health.

And for me as a white woman, raising a white daughter, I have sometimes felt unclear about how best to talk to my girl about race, her white privilege (and how it intersects with the sexism she experiences), and the systemically and historically racially unjust country we live in.

This has caused harm (because white silence always causes harm).

I want instead to take my own broken heart and take action to support change, and I want to show my girl how to do the same with her broken heart. This only happens when we have real, often uncomfortable, brave conversations about race. (Also, we can use our power by donating to organizations like Together Rising to help end the child detention abuse that is happening on the border of the U.S. right now. Would this be happening if the kids were white? No.).

So, are you ready to pull up your chair with me for this second episode of a two-part series on raising our kids in a racially unjust culture?

• Are your kids white? Or do they benefit from white privilege in our society?
• Are you so ready to know better, and do better as a white woman? And support your kids in doing the same?

Whether you’re totally new to this conversation, or deep within anti-racism work in your own life, I invite you to come join us as we continue to unlearn together and show up better together.

Today, I’m talking with Jennifer Harvey, a writer, speaker, minister, and professor whose lifetime of work has focused on racial justice. She’s also the white parent of white kids. Her new book, Raising White Kids: Bringing Up Children in a Racially Unjust America, calls in parents raising white kids to have real conversations, and invites new ways to take action to address the systemic issues of privilege and racial injustice.

And just like Dani McClain from last month’s episode on Raising Black Kids in a Racist Culture, she’s got a gigantic heart to match the challenge.

(And whoever is the first to write a comment in our comment session below the video of this interview will be gifted with a copy of Jennifer’s book!!)

Click the video below to watch the new episode.

Once you’ve gotten a chance to check out the video, leave a comment below —

Love,
Sil

P.S.  Forward this video to a mama who getting more real about hard conversations in motherhood. Because sharing is caring, and everyone could use a stronger bond.

Hi, We’re Sil & Eliza!

The mother-daughter dynamic duo behind Mothering & Daughtering. We’re downright devoted to you thriving not just surviving with your daughter during the preteen, teen years and beyond.

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